September 4th, 2006
Had breakfast with Alan Levin, Esther Dyson, Veni Markovski and his wife this morning and Alan reminded us this story that was forward to IPer by Meng Wong last week. I think this has to be retold :-)
First, the boring story on MSM iPod prompts airport scare in Ottawa:
A suspicious package found in an aircraft washroom on a flight from Chicago on Tuesday afternoon brought out Ottawa police canine and bomb-disposal units. A member of the crew found the package about 4 p.m. The plane landed safely and was isolated away from the terminal.
Now, the funny version on World of Warcraft Forum :-)
It all started when I got out of my seat to go to the bathroom. I went to the bathroom, washed my hands, and returned to my seat. A little while later the two stewardesses on the flight crossed each other in the aisle. They had a quick conversation that I was in earshot of.
“I locked off the front lav. There’s something in the toilet that’s preventing it from flushing. Run some water and see if you can clear it.” My face immediately turned red. The seat cover! I thought. It must have been too big to flush! I should have thrown it out!
I was so embarrassed. I tried to act normal … I took a sudden interest in the contents of the seat pocket in front of me, acted nonchalant and all. I watched as the stewardess got on her hands and knees in the lavatory and did unfathomable dirty work.
Sometime later, I decided it would be best if I forgot the whole thing happened, so I went to put on my headphones and drown myself in iPod music. But … no iPod. I panicked, checked my other pockets. Where was it? Not under the seat, not in the pockets, not … anywhere. I looked up to the stewardesses. One of them had run past me in a decent clip. She was carrying a green handbook. She brought it to the other stewardess. They flipped through the handbook, read a page, then made a call. The other stewardess had retrieved a blue metal box and was removing some equipment from it.
I put two and two together. I knew what had happened.
So I walked up to the stewardesses, both clamoring over the handbook, and tapped one on the shoulder.
“So, I had an iPod before I went to the bathroom, and now I don’t. I think I know what’s in the toilet.”
We had a quick conversation. I told them, “You don’t have to call the TSA or anything, it’s just my iPod.” They said, “Oh, but we already did.”
So now I’m starting to realize that this is turning into a big problem. They offer their condolences, tell me that it’s unfortunate, and I take a seat. Okay. So far, not so bad. I return to my seat and spend the rest of the flight trying to act normal.
That is, right up until the pilot comes over the intercom.
“Folks, this is the captain. I don’t want to alarm you, but we’ve found a suspicious device in the front lavatory. Now, we think it’s probably nothing, but in this day and age … you can never be too careful. We’ll be landing at Ottawa, where we will await further instructions.”
The cabin erupted with commotion. At that very moment, my face fell into my hands. What have I done?
This is why MSM never gets it :-)